|
 |
Main Page | Month Archive | Email Updates | RSS Feed | Print Version
The Public Diplomacy Blog is intended to stimulate dialog among scholars, researchers, practitioners and professionals from around the world in the public diplomacy sphere. The opinions represented here are the authors' own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the USC Center on Public Diplomacy at the Annenberg School.
BETWEEN THE WRONG THING AND ‘THE DONE THING’
JUN 7, 2007 - 8:10AM PDT
Posted by Gbemisola Olujobi
All posts by this author
USC Center on Public Diplomacy Research Associate Gbemisola Olujobi sheds light on one of the pejorative images that has come to define Africa in the eyes of many around the world.
Corruption goes by many names in Africa -- "kola," "egunje," "maslaha," "kompo," "kitu-kidogo," "tikoko," "toshiyar-baki," "sweetener," etc. Everyone recognizes it as a gangrenous evil. Sometimes, however, the line between wrongdoing and the done thing tends to be...a little fuzzy.
The story is told of an African public officer who went to a Swiss bank and announced himself as a member of his country's anti-corruption commission. He said he was checking on externally held assets and asked for a list of his countrymen with deposits held in the bank. The bank manager told him that was not possible. The African big man produced a letter of authority from his country’s president. Still, the bank manager did not budge. In anger, the big man pulled a gun and threatened to shoot the manager unless he gave him the list. "Shoot me if you must," the bank manager said. “I cannot release the names you require." "Excellent!" exclaimed the African, opening his briefcase to reveal bundles of dollars. "Open me an account."
Despite the humor of this fable, corruption is no longer a laughing matter in Africa. A report by the African Union estimates that corruption costs African economies in excess of $148 billion a year. This figure is estimated to represent 25 percent of Africa's GDP and to increase the cost of goods by as much as 20 percent.
In Nigeria alone, it is estimated that 220 billion pounds (about $500 billion) of development assistance has been stolen by successive corrupt leaders since independence. According to Malam Nuhu Ribadu, chairman of Nigeria’s Economic and Financial Crimes Commission, this amount represents six times the money that went into rebuilding Europe through the Marshall Plan at the end of the Second World War.
Beyond the fiscal, corruption costs dreams, hopes, futures and lives, with the poor bearing a disproportionate brunt of the consequences. According to Transparency International, the poor suffer this disadvantage because they are more vulnerable to extortion and intimidation for basic services, as well as to the harsh consequences of corruption on their country's overall development. This is because corruption increases the cost of public services. It also lowers their quality; can restrict the public's access to water, health and education; diverts public resources away from social sectors and the poor; and limits development, growth and poverty reduction.
Many wars have been waged against corruption. The African Union Convention Against Corruption, the United Nations Convention Against Corruption (which has been ratified by about 13 African states) and the New Partnership for Africa’s Development's peer review mechanism are among efforts intended to kick corruption out of the continent.
But by far the most creative and realistic has been Mohammed Ibrahim’s ingenious solution -- the Mo Ibrahim Prize for Achievement in African Leadership. One of Africa’s most successful businessmen, the Sudanese-born Ibrahim is the founder of telecom giant Celtel.
The idea of the prize is to rate governance in 53 African countries each year. Winning leaders will then get prize money of $5 million (2.7 million pounds) over 10 years after they leave office, plus $200,000 (107,000 pounds) a year for life. The initiative has been endorsed by global figures such as Nelson Mandela, Bill Clinton, Tony Blair, Kofi Annan and Paul Wolfowitz.
The selection of winners of the Mo Ibrahim Prize will be guided by the Ibrahim index of African governance, which will rank all sub-Saharan countries according to quality of governance. The index will be developed under the direction of professor Robert Rotberg of the Kennedy School of Government at Harvard University. The selection criteria will include sustainable economic development, human development (health and education), transparency, empowerment of civil society, democracy, human rights, rule of law and security.
"Ranking governance in this manner," says Rotberg, "would provide both the carrot and the stick for positive change."
It took Ibrahim to remind everyone that African leaders have little to look forward to after holding office. There is nothing like a U.S. former president’s library anywhere in Africa. It is as if they are expected to serve their countries and go into oblivion afterward. The fear of this oblivion is one of the things that drive official corruption in Africa.
"Suddenly all the mansions, cars, food, wine is withdrawn. Some find it difficult to rent a house in the capital. That incites corruption; it incites people to cling to power,” Ibrahim said in an interview with the Financial Times. He could not have put it more aptly.
"The prize will offer essentially good people, who may be wavering, the chance to opt for the good life after office," Ibrahim offered.
Ibrahim is eminently qualified to know what ails African leaders. He built a very successful mobile phone business in countries that do not rank high on Transparency International’s corruption perception index, such as Chad, Niger, Sierra Leone and Malawi. He certainly hobnobbed with the leaders of these countries during the course of establishing his business in their domains, and had the advantage of observing them at close quarters. Some of them may have even shared secret pains with him.
According to Ibrahim, "There is much gossip and speculation about what Tony Blair will do when he leaves office. Will he join the lecture circuit? Will he take on a series of directorships? Will he write his memoirs?
"In Africa, the choices for heads of state are more sobering. Most leave office with no chance of sustaining a lifestyle equivalent to the one they enjoy while in office. The income of former heads of government may seem a trifling issue compared to the major problems faced by many of the continent’s citizens. In fact, it is of fundamental importance in securing its future.
"A situation in which leaders face three choices -- relative poverty, term extension, or corruption -- is not conducive to good governance."
The prize, says Ibrahim, offers a fourth option -- govern well and receive a prize worth more than the Nobel Prize.
Five million dollars is actually paltry compared to what a Mobutu or Abacha had access to. Both dictators are believed to have amassed nothing less than $5 billion each. But according to thinker and writer Ethan Zuckerman, "the prize isn’t designed to convince the Mobutus of the world that good governance beats dictatorial plunder -- it’s designed to reward leaders like Ellen Johnson Sirleaf, John Kufuor or Amadou Toure, who will likely leave office after fulfilling their terms and will need to figure out what you do after leading your nation. The hope attached to the Ibrahim prize is that retired African leaders might be able to be constructive civil society figures, perhaps in the way former American presidents like Carter and Clinton have been since leaving office."
Zuckerman finds a peg for Ibrahim's solution in a conversation he once had with Jose Maria Figueres, the former president of Costa Rica. "When he was leaving his position with the World Economic Forum, I asked him what it was like to be a former president looking for work. He smiled and gave an answer I’m sure he’s given a few thousand times: 'You know, it's a new direction for people in my situation. Historically, being a Latin American president wasn't a job you survived."
Figueres' dilemma must be shared by many African heads of government. I once interviewed the former governor of one of Nigeria's 36 states a few months after he handed the office over to a successor. Inevitably, the interview veered into life after retirement, and he shared with me a close relative of what we all call "culture shock." I will call it "change-of-circumstance shock" here.
In Nigeria, top government officials usually ride in convoys heralded by sirens and outriders. Ordinary mortals are cleared out of the way of these presidential and governorship convoys and made to wait while the dignitary rides through.
For this former governor, one of the most difficult moments of retirement occurred when his car was cleared out of the way of his successor's convoy and he was made to pull to the side while his successor rode on in glory. From what I saw in his eyes, he would have worked harder at holding on to power if he had given more thought to the reality of becoming an ordinary citizen.
This may not make sense to people in the West who appear not to attach much importance to status or perks of office. As a guest of the Goethe Institute in Berlin in 2003, I was part of a group that visited a member of the German Bundestag. My jaw dropped when the parliamentarian jumped on a bicycle and rode off merrily after our meeting. I recall that I didn't quite find it admirable that a member of Parliament would ride a bicycle. To my African mind, it was absolutely scandalous that such a "big man" would even touch a bicycle. I couldn't immediately make the link between the German MP's bicycle and corruption in my country and continent. I was totally blinded by my values, beliefs and attitudes -- simply put, my culture.
Many would like not to see any link between corruption and culture in Africa. The sad truth, however, is that the malignancy of corruption in Africa cannot be properly excised without paying attention to culture. My aversion to an MP riding a bicycle is probably what drives a typical Nigerian public servant who earns the equivalent of about $500 a month to acquire the latest Mercedes or BMW automobile. He needs to keep up the appearances of a big man with a big office, so that ordinary people like me will not despise him for being "big man for mouth," a big man in name only. How then do people (like me) expect him to fund the appearances that will make him a "beta" (real) big man?
Victor Dike, in "Corruption in Nigeria: A New Paradigm for Effective Control," argues that cultures that stress economic success as an important goal but have low access to economic opportunities have a predisposition to high levels of corruption. Remember here that our big man, like other public and civil servants, sometimes works for months without getting paid. He has to meet his existential needs while also living up to the bigness of his office. "Under this condition," says Dike, "many citizens would reject the rule of the game and criminally innovate to make ends meet."
Now, what is our big man supposed to do about his army of cousins, uncles, aunties, fathers, mothers, grandparents, great-grandparents, in-laws, townsmen, friends, old classmates, former colleagues, club members, age-grade members, descendants' union members, old boys' association members, drinking buddies, former and current girlfriends, neighbors and sundry associates when he is suddenly catapulted from among them into a big office? Everyone who needs a meal, pocket money, school fees, a job, a contract, a university admission or any other favor simply finds his way to the big man’s residence or office, with the full assurance that the need will be met. His resources must meet the needs of every member of this army, otherwise he is a "yeye" (useless) big man.
Dike cites the work of Edward Banfield, which notes that corruption is linked to strong family values involving intense feelings of obligation. That, according to Banfield, explains the high levels of corruption in southern Italy and Sicily, where the Mafia has the attitude of "anything goes" as long as it advances the interests of the family.
Now let's go back to our big man. Apart from taking care of his inner caucus, he also has countless obligations to his community. It is even worse if he holds an elective office. In that case, the people put him there by voting for him. To refuse to attend to the community’s needs in the office into which his people put him amounts to biting the fingers that fed him. For the politician who plans to come back to ask for votes in the next election, that is nothing but political suicide. He would have chopped (eaten) and then defecated into the soup pot, so he would not be welcome for another feast. No career politician would take this option.
So, our big man has to initiate and fund development projects in his village, give scholarships to indigent students, send his old classmate to England for a liver transplant, renovate the village palace, build a new town hall, contribute toward feeding widows and orphans, be the chairman at every wedding, be the chief mourner at every funeral, be the chief launcher at every fundraiser and find a job for every graduate his village produces.
As N.G. Egbue rightly points out in "Africa: Cultural Dimensions of Corruption and Possibilities for Changes," "The average person's financial and other forms of resources must be seen to assist the uplifting of others in his immediate community or even beyond. This often determines the status given to any individual and in particular, the level of political support due to a person."
This situation, says Egbue, "combines with a tendency towards ethnic allegiances and parochialism, to encourage the average African to condone unethical acquisition of wealth by friends and relatives."
If the big man fails in his duties as a worthy son of the soil, he is considered selfish and referred to as "adanikanje" (one who consumes a feast all by himself). Such a big man is likened to the selfish tortoise who ate so much that his innards burst through his stomach. He becomes the object of public opprobrium, and every member of his family suffers the community’s ill wishes.
Make no mistake about it, the needs of the big man’s inner caucus as well as those of his wider community are genuine needs. These are actually people who need help with the next meal, means of livelihood, school fees, medical attention, potable water and rural electrification. When you combine poverty, deprivation and the absence of social security with the lack of a safety net for individuals who have access to public funds, you have a pretty mess on your hands.
Don’t be surprised when the "generous" big man, who has obviously dipped his hands into the treasury, is rewarded with chieftaincy titles by his community. Yes, he is a worthy son of the soil because of the boreholes he has drilled in his village, the scholarships he has awarded, the contracts he has facilitated, the sick and hungry he has succored and the jobs he has secured for his unemployed kith and kin. He has met many crucial and immediate needs. The larger consequences of his corruption can be sorted out later. A hungry man is not only an angry man, he is also a very unreasonable man!
And even though everyone cries about the ills of corruption, in reality corruption happens only when you don't benefit from it. When it is done by a member of your clan and you follow chop (benefit from it), it is not corruption. It is the done thing.
Jean-Pierre Olivier de Sardan captures this ambivalence vividly in "A Moral Economy of Corruption in Africa?" He says, "Corruption is someone else. Only the practices to which one falls victim or from which one is excluded are denounced as being corrupt. Those in which one plays a role oneself never give rise to condemnation."
Besides, you would think there would be at least one voice of reason in our big man’s community. Someone somewhere must be honest enough to recognize the big man’s largesse as part of an ill-gotten pile and be ready to expose him. Now, this is like the proverbial belling of the cat. Who will do it? It is like using one's head to crack a coconut. Native wisdom informs that the person who uses his head to crack a coconut will not partake of it. That fellow should be dead, in a coma or nursing too serious a headache to chew anything.
Says de Sardan, "in a ;face to face' society, the price of open conflict is too high. It is unthinkable to denounce a relative, a neighbor, the relative of a friend (or neighbor), that is, someone with whom one has a personal tie, or even a weak one: social disapproval would be too heavy."
Why do all the swashbuckling corruption eradication crusades seem to have little or no effect in Africa? According to de Sardan, "Unfortunately, beyond declarations of principle, pathetic or exasperated acknowledgements and moralistic condemnations, the social mechanisms of corruption are scarcely explored, nor are its processes of legitimation seen from the actors' point of view."
De Sardan argues for "as subtle as possible, a restitution of the value systems and cultural codes which permit a justification of corruption by those who practice it." He points to "certain social norms widely represented in modern Africa, which 'communicate' with or influence the practices of corruption."
Dike also leans on the work of Robert K. Merton to identify the link between culture and corruption. "His means-ends schema implies that corruption is sometimes a motivated behavior responding to social pressures to violate the norms, so as to meet the set goals and objectives of a social system."
Many social scientists also argue that petty corruption in developing countries arises from the clash or conflict between traditional values and the imported norms that accompany modernization and sociopolitical development. They describe it as a natural stage of development for societies in transit between the ancient and the modern. Using Western norms to categorize corruption in Africa may therefore present some benign problems.
De Sardan highlights some practices that are still alive and well in many Sahelian countries today (as in many other African countries) that may be hard to explain to anyone in the West. Among these done things are monetary gifts such as "tukunci," which is given to a bearer of glad tidings; "alaada nooru," given to the witness of an important transaction; "habiize," given to relatives when one returns from a journey; "turguru nooru," given to women encountered in the act of hair-braiding; "yuubi," given to women engaged in collective work; giving gifts to the customary chief when one goes to greet him to put one in his good books; "kambu-zaa," a contribution to marriage, baptism or enthroning; "kola" or "a little something," given to a compliant or helpful civil servant; "kalam dene" (ink money), given to a marabout for the ink that he needs to trace the verses of the Quran or to a bureaucrat in charge of one’s case; "moo dabu," given to a cashier when one withdraws a huge sum of money from the bank or post office to prevent the evil eye. Now, how do you explain these things to a World Bank official from Washington, D.C., or to the program director of a New York-based NGO?
"This multiplication of gifts in everyday life" presents a dilemma. According to de Sardan, "it leaves room for the drowning of illicit gifts within the mass." On the other hand, however, not doing the done thing is "not only a sign of avarice or bad manners, but also carries the risk of attracting misfortune."
Like practically everyone who lives in Africa, I am often caught in the incongruity of straddling two worlds -- the ancient and the modern.
A policeman once accosted me at one of Nigeria’s famous road blocks as I cruised home from work after a long day. He wanted to see my vehicle particulars and fire extinguisher. I had removed the fire extinguisher from the car for some reason during the weekend and had forgotten to put it back. Despite my explanation, the policeman was not going to take it lightly. If I didn't settle (give a bribe), he would take me to the police station.
Somewhere along the line, he realized I was a journalist and was not sure what could come out of asking a journalist for a bribe, so he changed his tactic. He told me how difficult life was for him. His pay was meager and was often not given on schedule. The inspector-general of police had just been removed for corrupt enrichment, so I knew very well what he was talking about. But I insisted on not parting with my money. When he saw that his tales of hardship had no effect on me, he tried to sway me with prayers.
Now, everyone in Nigeria loves to be prayed for and I am no exception. This is why churches are the most lucrative enterprise in the country. The easiest way of getting someone to grant you a favor or see things your way is by showering prayers on them.
"May you never suffer in your life, madam," he prayed. I had suffered many times, so I was not impressed. ("Madam" is a term of respect for a woman of status in Nigeria.)
"May you go to London, America, Germany, Spain. …" I had been to all these places, so that prayer was lost on me.
"You will not die but you will live, madam." That was "heavy." I did not want to die, but I did not want to lose my money either.
"May you never bury your child, madam."
That last prayer got me badly. It touched the most primordial of my fears. At that point, I ceased to be a journalist. I became simply the fearful mother of an only child. I spend a significant portion of my time and resources ensuring that no evil befalls my child, so that is a prayer I need badly. "Amen," I murmured under my breath as I reached into my purse with trembling hands and fished out a generous offering for a thoughtful prayer -- a 200 Nigerian naira note (less than $2 U.S.).
"More blessing, madam," the policeman wailed excitedly, caressing the bribe, "dash" or whatever as he waved me on. Did I just bribe a policeman? I wondered all the way home.
It was not a bribe, I consoled myself. It was a "dash," a gift. The poor guy had probably not been paid for months. Besides, I could not ignore that last prayer. I remembered the monkey in one of my grandmother’s stories who refused to say amen to prayers and suffered dire consequences later. "Won ni k'obo sami lojosi, o'nse faari," my head sang of the arrogant monkey who would not say amen to prayers.
I got home about 10 minutes to midnight. My mother was waiting up for me. I told her about the policeman, his prayers and the money I gave him. She had a more disturbing angle to the encounter. "Thank God you gave the money," she said, rubbing her palms in supplication. "Look at the time! You must not refuse to give 'saraa' (alms) at this time of the night. That may have been an 'anjoonu' (evil spirit) in the guise of a policeman."
Because African cosmology leans heavily on the supernatural, adversities such as ill health, financial downturn, road accidents and sudden deaths are considered to be the work of malevolent spirits in many societies on the continent. Such spirits are believed to be capable of taking on human forms when they are up to mischief. They are also believed to be more active at night.
I have not been able to refuse a policeman a bribe after dark since then. This could be an 'anjoonu,' I always reason, recalling my mother's admonishing finger.
Now, how do I explain this to my American friends? "Bullshit," they would probably say.
Related Articles
Michael Todd: "Travel Advisory: Dealing With Corruption," published in Travel Africa Magazine (edition five, autumn 1998)
Transparency International: "Frequently Asked Questions on Corruption and Africa"
Ethan Zuckerman: "Is $5m the cost of good governance in Africa?" ethanzuckerman.com/blog/?p=1076
"Prize Offered to Africa's Leaders," BBC News news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/6086088.stm
Gbemisola Olujobi is the Pulitzer Fellow at the USC Annenberg School for Communication in Los Angeles, and a Research Associate at the USC Center on Public Diplomacy. Previously, Olujobi was Editor of the Living Section at The Guardian, Nigeria’s biggest and most influential newspaper.
Read Comments (2) | Add Your Own
 Read Comments:
Julie on June 13, 2007 @ 1:35 pm:
The selection criteria will include sustainable economic development, human development (health and education), transparency, empowerment of civil society, democracy, human rights, rule of law and security.
Sustainable economic development is useless unless it provides jobs for the indigenous people - oil is sustainable economic development but it wreaks havoc in most underdeveloped countries.
human development - how about increase # of people with access to clean water, decrease number of people living on less than $2 a day, decrease in mortality of children <5, increased life span, reduced AIDs - Nigeria, since democracy has failed miserably in all of these.
transparency is a meaningless buzz word - look at the U.S.
empowerment of civil society - let the people do what the people will do and stop meddling
democracy - should come from the people not be forced down their throats. Democracy doesn't work everywhere and if its coming from Harvard it means capitalism not democracy. Nigeria is an abject failure to its people since democracy, but it's done great at raising the GDP and the oil companies' revenues and suppling the U.S. with oil.
human rights - yes
rule of law - yes
security - comes with law, justice and equality
how about a free press which no democracy can survive without.
Travis on July 18, 2007 @ 7:02 pm:
corruption? Yes. Is the country allowing scammers safe haven? I played this scammer along. Might make a good story.
July 18th, 2007
Conversation with:
Elizabeth
Click to view profile
Last login: 14 hours ago. Your match with her expires in 30 days.
my name is elizabeth,i am single with a son of 7years,i love my son so much,he means so much to me but i need love in my life,true love,a loving,caring,humble,honest and reliable man.
< Back to Inbox 1 to 36 of 36
She wrote hello T 28 days ago
how are you doing,good to see one like you wanna meet (more...) and makes me feel so special,that shows how nice you are.hey my name is Elizabeth but my friends call me elly,i'm single though i was once married,i have a son and his 7years old,i am into advertising,i do billboard,tv,press advert and photography.i like to watch the sports channel alot,i also love the beach,i go there most of the time with my son,at times i go to the movies too,so you gonna say something about you though i don't log on here often but you write me to my personal email,ellyelton13@yahoo.com,hope to hear from you real soon and pls you take good care of yourself. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 28 days ago
What city do you live in?
She wrote Re: hello T 25 days ago
topeka in kansas,you?reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 23 days ago
Guess ya aren't in much better place than I am. Wichita... not much goes on here. I keep a good life going though. How about you?
She wrote Re: hello T 21 days ago
FINE,actually i am with my mom right now and i am thinking of coming back to the states next week so we can get to meet real soon baby.reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 21 days ago
You have plenty of resources and can travel back and forth with plenty of free time. That is nice.
She wrote Re: hello T 18 days ago
hmmm not that i have the resources or stuff like that (more...) but i do things i have to do,when i have to do them,you know.just like now,i was trying to make a withdrawal from my account two days ago from my credit card and i couldn't so i called my bank and they say if i have a friend so they can help wire some money to her redit card for so she can help me make withdrawal but looking at it now i only have contact with you so i was thinking the can help send to you for me,all they just need is the name of the bank that issued your credit with the bank's address and zipcode,credit card number,the limitation of the your card and your fullname,thats all,so what do you think. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 18 days ago
wow. Great to hear back from you. I don't get many (more...) responses on here and I don't get many visitors out here on the estate. It is lonely and not many people around out here living by the lake. The houses are huge but so far apart that people aren't friendly and visit. I know what you mean about how awkward credit cards can be and banks so stubborn to be sure. How can I help? (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 18 days ago
i just need you to help collect some money from my (more...) account but the bank will wire to your credit card for me,and for them to do that the lady that pciked up my call said they will need the name of the bank that issued your credit card,the address and zipcode of the bank,the highest amount of money your card can take,the credit card number and your fulname but if you can lend me the money for now to get back then i can make my withdrawal form there and give to you,what do you think. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 18 days ago
That's sounds reasonable to me. I am always glad to (more...) help. Have them get ahold of me. Hope to hear from you soon. You look so lovely. I'm sure you are just as nice. (less..)
You wrote Re: hello T 18 days ago
Is it bad to ask for more photos of you? Pleeeeease???????
She wrote Re: hello T 17 days ago
offcourse not my dear,i can email you some pictures (more...) i have here but baby i'll need you to write me the details so i can call my bank tomorrow,ok.write me your personal email address so i can mail you my dear. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 17 days ago
That would be great. You seem to be really nice. Yesterday (more...) I called Julie(my personal aide). She handles alot of things for the estate and pays the work staff who do the chores around the house. She also handles airfare and hotel reservations for me so I thought she'd have the credit card info. She said that the accountant Jerry would have to decide which account to use for you. Jerry Bradtinton is my personal accountant separate from the corporations. He was fishing in Canada this week with his three sons. Sort of a guys only fishing trip for father/son bonding. He doesn't get much time with them. He's supposed to be back for this week. I would have to wait to get the info from him in the next day or so. I really enjoy helping people. Everything has come so easily for me that I feel I owe to help others. So will you be coming back to your home in the USA in the next month? When can we meet? You look tall in the photo. How tall are you? Tell me more about yourself? (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 16 days ago
oh dear,thats so sweet of you trying to get help,that (more...) shows how nice and good man you are,offcourse yes,i am coming home and would love to hang out with you so much when i come,we can go for dinners and cinemas together,there will be lots of fun,i was thinking i could make it before 4th of july but i don't think that will be possible for now,but baby,whose credit card do you want me to use,i thought i was gonna be using yours.who is Jerry Brandtinton,i don't really need an account per say,i just need one who has a credit card so my bank can help send some money into the credit card,thats all but if you think you can help get the money from some one and i pay back when i come to save all the stress that will be very lovely,all i just need is about 25 hundred,i can't wait to get home,no place like home,hop-e you are doing great baby,pls write me soon ok.take care. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 16 days ago
Great to hear from you. I don't have much to do each (more...) day but I have many hobbies. I collect rebuilt cars and like to take some out for nice drives but don't drive all of them because they need to stay mint. You can't make it back for the 4th of July? that is not good news. Could I come visit? I could have Julie make my travel plans and I could come there. I don't have much to do around here that needs my attention. Jerry is my personal accountant. I wasn't making a new account for you. Just getting the information for you. It is my money, not his. He just keeps the books and expenses etc. You only need 2500? That isn't much. I carry that much with me most of the time. Jerry says it's easier than dealing with small amounts in my 'books'. He didn't call back today. I left him a message yesterday for this and he is supposed to be back some time this week from Canada. I am doing great. Thanks for asking. I need to order dinner tonight. Monday night is the night I don't get a real cooked dinner at home. I order from some nice restaurants who have elite delivery. I like that. It adds variety in my week. What is your town and address? I can make plans to visit. Tell your family hi for me! Travis. (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 15 days ago
hey sweetie,how're you doing today.poor you,wish i (more...) was there last night to make dinner for you.whats your favourite meal.so Jerry is your accountant,its sad i can't make it for 4th but since you said you will come over to see me that will be great but you know you gonna have to spend some few days with me,hun.so will you help send the 25 hundred to the cargo man for me so i can get all i need this week then book my ticket back to the states next week. (less..)reply report abuse
She wrote Re: hello T 14 days ago
hey baby,how're you doing today,i was just thinking (more...) about you so i decided to come check if you've sent me a note but very sad i got none,hope you are doing great hun,hope to hear from you real soon. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 14 days ago
Great news!!!! I found some volunteer work to do last (more...) night and today. I am helping out at a fireworks stand selling fireworks for charity. It's fun and the people are nice. Maybe next year you can help too! I really had wanted to come and see you but didn't get your information. I can make flight plans tomorrow when I know exactly where I'm going. I didn't call Jerry when you said it would be good for me to come visit you. I thought you wanted me to go to your bank while I am there. I can take care of it then and we can have a nice time. Is all of your family there? I'll bet your son is a good little man. Is he anxious to get back to the United States? You will be back before school starts again in September right? Anyway, enough questions. I have to get going. Don't be sad. We can meet and have a good time!!! p.s. why do you call me baby? (less..)
You wrote Re: hello T 14 days ago
oh. I didn't want you to think you would need to have (more...) a place for me to sleep. I am quite capable of staying at commercial lodging. Let me know what hotel I can stay at. I need the name and address of the hotel. If you can get me a telephone number of the hotel that would be good too! Julie will figure out the airport and times and can make lodging reservations for me. I'm thinking this weekend plus three or four days next week. What do you think? Travis (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 12 days ago
baby,where you sleep is no problem,ok.you can stay (more...) in my house as long as you're not gonna kill me ok hmmmm,but right now i need to get home to make preparation before you will come over,thats why i need you to help send some money to Mr. Babatunde Alarape,thats my mom's helper here sweetie,cus i will have to give my mom some money for her medicals and some other things and to book my self for the flight back to the states,ok.let me know if you are gonna help send the money to him or not,and i can pay you that back when later if you want ok,i am done with everything here just waiting on you Travis dear. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 12 days ago
Yes. I said I will help. I can come visit there and (more...) visit your bank with the money, I'd be glad to do it. You have been very nice. I don't find nice people often. I can stay with you at your mom's house? That would be nice. She would let us stay together or in separate rooms??? I can pay for medical bills if they are not much. I can also buy your ticket for the trip back. Maybe we can fly together. How much longer do you need to stay there? Time to go for now. I visit a nursing home for volunteering. It's fun and the elderly enjoy having a visitor. Some people don't visit their parents. I don't have parents there but I like to visit anyway. I have fun there. Yours, Travis. (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 12 days ago
baby you don't have to come over here,you're coming (more...) coming over to Topeka not here,if you can just help send the money to him pls,i will be on the next available flight back to the states and you can come meet there.i can give you Mr. Babatunde's details so you can help via western union to him.so i can book my flight and drop the money for my mom as i promised her then we can have time with each other so much when i come Travis. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 12 days ago
I don't mind visiting. I do like to travel. I would (more...) have liked if you told me earlier that you didn't want me to visit. I like to see new places. What part of Topeka do you live in? I've been there many times and have stayed there for long periods of time. There are not nice hotels there and the restaurants are not as good as in major cities. What street and neighborhood do you live at. Is it a nice house? I have been to many of the schools there. They use many of the products from my corporations. What school does your son go to? Let me know the details if you change your mind about me visiting you and your mother. I can use the details for the money if you want it sent that way. Julie will get it to Jerry and he will send it. I'll tell him to do it so he knows it is what I want to do. Trav (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 12 days ago
what information do mean you need to send the money (more...) Travis i said you can help send to Mr. Babatunde here and not there, and not that i don't want you to come visit my mom but i will love us to take things real slow and not jump into thing that will piss us off and we'll regret ok. (less..)reply report abuse
She wrote Re: hello T 9 days ago
hey travis,how are you doing,hope you had nice time (more...) during the weekend,i don't why you haven't mail in a while now,are you mad at me,did i say some thing wrong. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 8 days ago
It just took me by surprise that you want to slow things (more...) down. I thought we were getting along. Doing things for each other. Meeting each other. Meeting your mom and your son. I thought we were doing well. I am a loving, caring, humble, honest, and reliable man just like you say you are looking for. You seemed eager to meet me. So I am not sure just what direction this is to go. T (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 8 days ago
baby,pls you don't have to get me wrong,i am not slowing (more...) things down in any way,you just don't understand me very clearly.i really wanna meet with you,inshort i can't wait to meet you,i keep thinking of you all the time and goty real real scared these past few days,thought you had left me for someone else.i explain to you that,my son is with my sister in topeka,just my mom here,i just want to come over to you but you said you will come over to topeka,thats fine by me baby,but the only problem i have now is me booking my ticket from here back to the states and giving mom some little money cus she depends on me now,she does not work again.hope you get me this time. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 6 days ago
Hi . was travellling for a few days. will write more later. good to see that you didn't forget me. Trav
She wrote Re: hello T 5 days ago
hmm good to see i haven't forgoten you but you have forgot all about me hun,thats good to see you showing me the real person you are Travis.reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 5 days ago
Thank you! I knew you would appreciate my kindness (more...) and thoughtfulness. I know you wanted to slow down but still would have liked to visit you last week. I think we would have had a good time. I don't have to go to all the board meetings of the corporations but with nothing to do I flew to New York to be there anyway. I don't know why you backed off from our closeness we were having. We were going to meet and be helping each other. I remember quite well the disappointment but am still hoping you want us to meet soon. What town and country are you in now. You never say where your mother lives. Are we close enough for you to share simple things like that? Should I not be so enthusiastic about us? Thought of you while I was traveling. Trav Singleton (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 4 days ago
i told you my mom stays in Nigeria,i never hide that (more...) from and that i was there with her and i said i need some little money to get my ticket back home and give my mom so me little money to before i liev and you decided to turn me down after you promised to always be there for me,i am to see you,i want to be with you but you are not even given me chance to explain when i need to hun,hope you having fun wherever you are since you are not here with me. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 2 days ago
bummer about the miscommunication. I really thought (more...) you would like me to come visit you in Nigeria. I just needed to be able to get Julie to arrange my tickets and lodging and you said I'd stay with you. I really don't mind. I travel around anyway and I would like to visit Nigeria especially with a good hostess!!! It would be easy to take care of the bank thing. I haven't heard from you much about that. Did you get that worked out with your bank? Did your sister send you money? I don't have the information about where to help but I can still come visit. I am just taking it easy this summer with trips and community events. I tinker around the house now and then when the staff lets me but they don't have much choice. You have had many chances to open up to me. I haven't stopped you from doing well with me. The door is open. I had a blast over the weekend. I didn't think or do anything with the family corporations. I just had fun. (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 32 hours ago
baby,i have bee feeling real bad ever since i didn't (more...) hear from you,thought you left me for some one else,i want to see you,not that i don't want to,i really do.its ok if you wanna come see my mom,i love that just that i don't wanna make you go through the stress of coming here but if you want to its fine by me baby,just tell me what arrangement you are making on coming and when you are so i can come to the airport and meet you ok,but we'll have to both stay in an hotel cus my mom's place is a small one.but right now we are going through lot with my mom,i am very broke cus i can't get money from my account from here,if you will help send some money baby pls,i will appreciate that,just do this for mom,ok.when you come you and i can go back to the states together. (less..)reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 24 hours ago
I'd love to meet her. Where are you staying. I just (more...) need the address and names so I can say for travelling over borders, my in country point of contact and ending destination. What hotel are you staying at now? (less..)
She wrote Re: hello T 13 hours ago
oh baby,i can't wait to meet you too honey,and i told her yesterday that you are coming,she was happy too,i don't live here you know so here is my mom's address...2b silver cresent close,Surulere,Lagos,Nigeria...but you just let me know when you will be leaving the states and your flight time and number,ok.but i stay at Sheraton Hotel,i am very sure you will love it there and again honey pls right now i am very broke,i need some little money if you don't mind,can you help send at least some little money to this man for me,he works for my mom...name-Mr. Babatunde Alarape...address-2b silver cresent close,city-Surulere,state-Lagos,country-Nigeria,zipcode-23401....you can just help send atleast a 1000 so i can help mom get some things needed,ok.hope to hear from you soon honey.reply report abuse
You wrote Re: hello T 3 minutes ago
wow..this is great. You say you want to hear from me (more...) soon. I like when I can get online so you can hear from me as soon as possible. I will be in Topeka next Sunday. I am in Chicago today. Arrived at noon today. I don't mind hotels. They are so different from the estate. I like the different styles of wood and marble and adornments. Sunday I can see your sister if you want. I could give her something to send to you. That way you won't have to wait for my trip. How much a night is the Sheraton there? I'm thinking of the first week of August. Why don't you stay with your mom? I thought you said you stayed with her. It would save funds. Oh another good news. I had wanted another house besides the one on the California coast and the estate here. A Director from Kindle Krasties Industries was let go and a VP was promoted in the corporation to his position. The VP doesn't want the corporate estate (corporate estates don't get taxed) so I can add the estate residence to my plans. Kindle Krasties Industries is headquartered in coastal Florida!!! I'm looking forward to get there and check it out. Sorry to bore you. You don't know much about me so I will try to open up and share more. I'd like to know more about you also. Need to go. Meeting a lady and gentleman for dining. p.s. Lagos looks nice on google satellite. We will have fun. Trav (less..)
Add a Comment:
 |
|
|
SEND TO FRIENDS
